Liberal Dicks

by lishra

For anyone living in the U.S., you’ve almost surely heard of the situation that New York Rep. Anthony Weiner has gotten himself (and several women) into. Basically, he tweeted a photo of his genital region covered by underwear last week, claimed his account had been hacked, and then on Monday he admitted that it was indeed a photo of him and that he’s been having various internet affairs with many women over the last few years. He claims it’s been six women, but I see no reason really trust that number. Three of the women involved have gone public with their names, which seems like a pretty high ratio if there were only six women total.

Weiner has been praised throughout the progressive and mainstream feminist blogosphere for his feisty defense of women’s reproductive rights and his ability to succinctly and humorously lambaste Republicans. He’s one of the few Democrats who is in the spotlight fighting for progressive issues. However, his pro-woman views seem to stop where his sexual desires begin.

One of the women who has gone public also released a couple hundred messages that she exchanged with the congressman on Facebook. Reading the messages is an uncomfortable venture, to say the lease. Typical of Rep. Weiner’s political style, he’s very aggressive and certainly doesn’t hold back on what he’s thinking. The reoccurring theme in the messages is that Weiner is pro-women’s-choices in that he supports your right to suck his dick [hat tip to Nine Deuce]. Not just any ol’ dick sucking though. He says more than once that he wants her to “gag” on his penis. “What the fuck?” you’re probably thinking. Indeed, this is a trope right out of contemporary pornography, which anti-porn activists such as Gail Dines and Robert Jensen have written about.

There’s a kind of bizarreness, now, in finding out that just a few months ago Weiner supported the removal of a “sexist” (his word) statue that shows a man towering above two women who lie at his feet. That’s the thing about supposedly progressive men. The personal is political as they support your right to an abortion, but the political isn’t all that personal when they are obsessed with getting women to talk about how much they want your penis in their mouths. Here’s a choice excerpt from the Facebook messages:

Weiner: i hear liberal girls are very, uh, accommodating of others
Weiss: of course! it is all about taking care of the little guy!
Weiner: little?! ouch. you’d be surprised how big

Not every progressive man is a porn-sick faux-ally though, but when men like Weiner turn out to be just that, it doesn’t make you all look that great. Every anti-porn woman who attempts to date men is familiar with this Schrödinger’s porn-user phenomenon. The guy seems great at first. . . he might even call himself a feminist or at least be in favor of vague “equality”. Then you discover that all of his free time is spent watching porn online and that — surprise — that’s the type of sex he expects you to have with him. Yeah, yeah, women’s rights and all that, but get on your knees.

Actor and fellow liberal dude Alec Baldwin has come to the defense of congressman Weiner, calling him a prime example of  “the modern, high functioning man”. Ah, yes — the ‘high functioning’ capabilities one must have to serially engage in explicitly sexual conversations with women online while simultaneously sending them cell phone photos of your penis. The skills! Bravo. (A good paraphrasing of Baldwin’s lovely little article can be found here.)

As political writer (and former girlfriend of Weiner) Kirsten Powers points out,

We know only about the women who were responsive to his overtures. The odds are very high that he struck out with many, and other women were victim to his unsolicited sex talk. [. . .] Just because a woman “likes” your video on Facebook doesn’t mean you can send her a picture of your penis. This is textbook sexual harassment.

The women who have come forward with photos and messages sent to them by the congressman were, apparently, rather okay with his advances. Although how likely is it that the women who felt skeeved out by his solicitations are going to put themselves out there in the same way?

These unknown women, as well as the ones who have named themselves, have been pulled into a political scandal that Weiner has created for them and himself. The woman who was the original recipient of the first dick pic on Twitter did not have sexy internet chats with Weiner, yet her name has been thrown about and implications made that she was one of his cyber-sex partners. From an article in today’s New York Times:

“I’ve had a really hard time trying to fight these implications that I’ve been involved in an inappropriate relationship with a married congressman,” she said.

She has struggled to stay out of the limelight, leaving college and completing class work by phone and e-mail.

Weiner apparently sent her a text message before his Monday press conference apologizing, presumably for all of the harm he has brought upon her in the last week. It’s not clear whether he apologized for sending her the photo in the first place, something he meant as “a joke”. She says she still doesn’t get what exactly was supposed to be a ‘joke’ about it and neither do I. All I get from that is a congressman sending a totally unsolicited photo of his junk to a woman on Twitter. I see a man who wasn’t all that apologetic or ashamed as he was massively complicating the lives of numerous women with his predatory behavior.

26 Responses to “Liberal Dicks”

  1. She had to leave college because of his sexual aggression. How typical. How many women are forced out of college and thus out of good careers because men won’t stop with the sexual harrassment or violence?

    The entire media scrum reminds me of locker room scrimmages over who has bragging rights and who scored the most. Donald Trump outtrumped himself when he called Weinger a “psycho” and bragged, “The fact is — Anthony Weiner is a bad guy. He’s a psycho, and when this came out, I was not surprised at all.”

    You gotta love men chiding other men for doing the exact same thing they’ve done: treated women badly.

    Here’s news for all you guys: We’re not that into your weiners, especially not in the awkwardly staged photo received unexpectedly. Phallic worship is your divine altar, not ours. But here’s the good news: you’re not suffering from sex addiction. It’s more properly named phallic delusion.

  2. I think that all men will do this sort of thing, the ones we know about are just the ones who get caught! Stop marrying them and stop voting for them. Right wing men are happy to throw left wing men to the wolves of deluded public opinion, in order to keep them out of power. I don’t know why left wing men don’t do the same back. Is it because left wing wives are more likely to leave than right wing wives, who know very well what their husbands do, but have bought into the system and concentrate on empty social climbing, instead of worrying about it.

    Republicans will see to it that all talented Democratic men will carry a stain on their reputations, because the dirt is always there if you choose to dig it up. This kind of thing undermines democracy itself, as soon as a democratic man gets into office he is besieged with sex scandals which are mostly all true. I think we should stop being shocked, best to accept men as they are and elect women instead.

  3. Just to add, excellent post Lishra!

    “Donald Trump outtrumped himself when he called Weinger a “psycho” and bragged, “The fact is — Anthony Weiner is a bad guy. He’s a psycho, and when this came out, I was not surprised at all.”
    You gotta love men chiding other men for doing the exact same thing they’ve done: treated women badly.”

    Exactly, Loretta, trumps a complete hypocrite.

  4. The conversation in the comments section here has reminded me of this video put out by a youtube user called “ask an asshole”. A feminist friend of mine asked him why men send unsolicited pictures of their penises :

    I can’t count the number of times I’ve been sent unsolicited pictures of men’s penises or them without their shirts on. Are there actually women out there that go for that kind of thing?

  5. Of course this is a prime time for powerful men to posture around this issue and make it all about them. Donald Trump and Alec Baldwin have no doubt harassed their fair share of women in their lives. Its only fair that they be able to weigh in on it when another dude gets caught. The fact that he’s married doesn’t come into the equation at all with their criticisms either. You’d think THE SANCTITY OF THE HOLY NUCLEAR FAMILY would come somewhere into this discussion. I hope in the next few days we will hear some more male-windbags come out and condemn this weiner scandal.

  6. When men want to feel sexual,they think of women as breasts and fuckholes, not as humans. They have all kinds of weird fetishes about parts of women’s bodies. That’s what M2T’s are about, too. That’s what excites them. That’s why they think parodying women makes them women. They don’t get it. Non-trans males just fetishize and objectify in “normal” ways.

    On many non-feminist websites straight women women are saying that they don’t get turned on by pictures of weiners. All over the internet they are saying this. Women are not like that, even though women have been brainwashed by patriarchy, they still are not. Women do not think in terms of body parts to get turned on. Women do not objectify men. Men appear to know no other way to get turned on.

    I don’t know what’s wrong with them. Really.

    Women need to get this. They are not like us in significant ways. Really.

  7. So true KatieS. Your comment made me chuckle because it reminded me of a guy- a M2T who keeps trying to post comments about his (inverted) dick over on Dirt’s site. Dirt keeps deleting them and the dude keeps posting them. The length, the diameter, the quality of the lubrication of his inverted dick. Really there is absolutely NO difference between the M2T and a regular dude sending out “the tale of his penis” to women who don’t want it, over and over again. (Except that the M2T says he “feels like a girl/fuckhole” of course). Some things surgery just can’t fix.

  8. Anthony Weiner is another male sexual predator and is abusing his position of political power. Weiner thinks his power will protect him from claims’ (sic) that he has subjected innumerable women to male sexual harassment. Almost same M.O. as another prominent predatory male who has been charged with raping a female hotel worker. Both these men view women as men’s rightful prey’ but malestream media’s focus as always has to be on the female victims Weiner targetted. Why? Because men’s sexual predatoriness must never be acknowledged or if malestream media does acknowledge it, such behaviour are the actions of a few ‘deranged males’ or else ‘this powerful male made a “mistake” and he is oh so sorry. Or even – powerful male was enduring personal problems; he was under immense stress; his wife doesn’t love him blah blah’ all common excuses used by malestream media and male predators to excuse/minimalise/justify their right to sexually prey on females.

    Trump and Baldwin – well they’re two sides of the same coin. Trump like so many men is laughing at Weiner because Weiner’s predatory behaviour has made him a laughing stock with the male regime. Baldwin is using the common male ploy of excusing another man’s sexual predatory behaviour because ‘men can’t help themselves.’ Trump and Baldwin demonstrate for the umpteenth time they are not remotely concerned about women’s right not to be subjected to male sexual predators. No it is all about men once again and about men challenging other men for power and status. That’s why Trump has ridiculed Weiner and claimed Weiner is a ‘psycho.’ Well it takes one to name one, but claiming a male sexual predator is a ‘psycho’ neatly deflects fact most men who sexually prey on women are not psychos they are all normal ‘respectable men’ and it is their public respectability which enables them to engage in sexual predatory behaviour with no accountability.

    Once again these men are focused only on men and their actions. It is all about men challenging other men and jostling for position at top of pryamid. Forget about the women who were subjected to Weiner’s sexual predatory advances – because world revolves around men and their constant struggle to gain the upper hand over other powerful men.

    Oh and it is common for political men to work very hard at supposedly supporting women’s rights but as herstory consistently tells us, these men’s actions are all about men’s rights to 24/7 sexual access to women without having that nasty side effect happening to them. What is that? Why the woman might become pregnant so of course women must have reproductive rights but only as long as it serves men.

  9. “Once again these men are focused only on men and their actions. It is all about men challenging other men and jostling for position at top of pryamid. Forget about the women who were subjected to Weiner’s sexual predatory advances – because world revolves around men and their constant struggle to gain the upper hand over other powerful men.”

    I agree. Women don’t want to see men’s dicks. But men are constantly displaying them to each other. That’s why none of the men are really calling him out. They don’t care one whit about the women harmed. The women will have their careers damaged, will have to drop out of school, but that is just a side note. These other men only care that the guy’s dick is getting so much airtime. And they are left out. It’s all about displaying their dicks to each other and the world. Ugh!

    The only reason to display them to women is as a threat or because the guy thinks we are like them, responding to objectified body parts.

    They are not like us. Really.

  10. Yes, exactly this: “I see a man who wasn’t all that apologetic or ashamed as he was massively complicating the lives of numerous women with his predatory behavior.”

    And a whole lot of men who don’t get that. The other male spin I’ve seen of this story is that people in the U.S. haven’t “grown up” about sex. In that frame, “sex” is positioned as just your basic adult experience and the scale and quality and female perspective within that experience don’t matter or are ignored. If a man is getting off, what’s the big deal? It’s just sex you silly girl. And isn’t it interesting that they either position opposition to their shit as prudery or immaturity. They apparently believe that the opposition is supposed to be cowed into saying in reply, “I’m NOT a prude, I love slut walk! send me raunchy photos of yer dick!!!” or “I’m a grown-up! I can take whatever you can dish out!!!” Males framing the experience of sexuality to their own benefit and completely glazing over what an enema bag this guy is. Whattya know.

  11. This is a great post, Lishra! Very well written. I hadn’t heard about Weiner, but I am originally from the great state of NY, so I will be posting this on my FB. THANKS!

  12. @Noanodyne. Yup, and it’s exactly the same spin that was used to defend Bill Clinton. And Clarence Thomas. And Bob Packwood. And that co-worker we’ve all had.

  13. Lishra, thank you for your perspective.

    Noanodyne, I love your comment. You’ve described the exact ad hominem attack they are using against us.

  14. his pro-woman views seem to stop where his sexual desires begin.

    Sums up every “pro-feminist” guy I’ve ever known.

  15. She left school and is now doing her school work by phone and computer because the boys from the media harassed her and would not stop no matter how many times she asked them to.
    You are absolutely right about lefty liberals embracing women’s right to serve them.
    Have I mentioned lately how much I loathe the corporate media?

  16. Great reply, Rahelle. I always say, if a mans tells you he’s profeminist, wait five minutes. That’s usually all it takes for him to show you he’s not 🙂

  17. Nuclearnight that mansplaining clip is priceless.
    It doesn’t matter what we think or what we say we think. Men will mansplain to us that we are wrong and actually think what they want to believe we think. After all, they know what we think better than we do.
    Whenever you hear a man laying down that particular mansplaination you know that he is a no means yes believer. He is a rapist.

  18. omg that mansplanation was horrible…i mean it was a great illustration of a rapist/rape apologist mansplanation but it was horrible! no means yes, you really like it etc.

    also, regarding disrupting womens lives with these scandals, harassment and humiliation….YES. i am just recently starting to appreciate all of this for what it clearly is: deliberate sabotage on womens time, energy and morale, to keep us distracted and embroiled so that we cease to function (temporarily or permanently) so men can move ahead, and survive, and thrive at our expense. its deliberate, on the part of men: its completely forseeable that this kind of shit would consume a womans life and be drain on her emotionally and physically….and men do it anyway. its worse than just “selfish” or inconsiderate on mens part, its part of the game they are constantly running on women, so that men can get ahead. they are literally and figuratively killing us off as legitimate competition by distracting and embroiling us in this shit, this drama, and with these threats. its a RAPE-THREAT to get a pic of a mans dick in your inbox: its a reference to UNWANTED PIV also known as RAPE.

  19. ps. this really makes me mad….just like what our old friend hugo pulls on women he is supposed to be teaching and supporting AS STUDENTS, when he knows how distracting this shit is to female-students specifically (ie. unwanted pregnancy and rape are huge factors in womens decision to drop out of school). all these fucking liberal dickwads are the same.

  20. Obama made a statement about the scandal. Here it is:

    “I can tell you that if it was me, I would resign,” Obama said Weiner’s actions were “highly inappropriate.”
    “I think he’s embarrassed himself. He’s acknowledged that. He’s embarrassed his wife and his family,

    Ok, then. The problem is that his actions were highly inappropriate, embarrassing himself and embarrassing his family. Shit! When I was a young kid I once got the giggles in church during hymn singing (egged on by my sister). THIS was deemed highly inappropriate, embarrassing myself and my family. And it was. I will acknowledge that, though I didn’t do so at the time.

    No one was hurt by my giggles, though likely a few people were annoyed. Given some people’s beliefs, I might have hurt myself and ended up in hell. But no one else would go to hell for my infraction. Though annoying, I was harrassing no one. I was not putting innocent women in a position where they’d have to drop out of school. I was not freaking out young women who had politics on their minds, wondering if they were now being stalked by some weirdo who just flashed them. A weirdo with enough power to find out where they lived, etc. I wasn’t adding further to the burdens of some number (likely high) of persons from an oppressed class.

    Oh, and what about the people who voted for him, expecting him to do something serious, like helping the economy, or the environment, or poor people, or middle class people losing their homes? (I’d say women and choice, but it would make me too mad). These people are hurt, too. You could even argue that he hurt every single U.S. citizen by not doing his job. Ok, a partial harm in the big stuff, but still a harm.

    And in the calls for his resignation, there doesn’t seem to be any mention of the real victims. It’s put on par with getting the giggles in church.

    We need women politicians. A solid majority. At all levels of government.

  21. I am waiting for the outcome of the Strauss-Kahn trial… will be interesting to see who is believed?????? I would be staggered if he is convicted. And of course we have the vomiting visage of his wife and daughters supporting his innocence. The right wing womon that Andrea Dworkin’s writes about are every where bolstering their male oppressors to the total detriment of all other womon.
    Until we as a community and a gender start doing what’s right for us instead of being deferential to the patriarchy we will never get any worthwhile, sustainable power in our own right as a gender…….

    Politics is not about ‘the people’ KatieS, its all about the power and keeping a few alpha males in control of the resources…the fact that womon get abused by these assholes is incidental and of no actual importance to the patriarchal state apparatus project.

    When it comes to the boyz they keep the fascist masculine faith between themselves and are millennia ahead of us womon when it comes to backing each other and defending their sex and their entitlements to womon and girls……and everything else in the world that is arranged by them for their benefit…….

    Come the revolution…for evolution takes too long my sisters…..

  22. I can’t believe it but I CAN believe it, ubfortunately. DemocracyNow has a segemtn today on why he’s being targeted because he’s a democrat. Not because he’s a sexist pig. Well, Amy Goodman has never covered many important storeis, like the case of the Lesbian Seven, the rape and murder of Oaxaca activist Sali Grace Eiler, and on and on and on. Even the powerful independent media women still uphold the men.

  23. @ybawife. Yes, I know that’s the reality. My point is that he didn’t live up to his role or even pretend to. I can still call bullshit on him for it, like Bill Clinton who cared little for the whole world, just an ego trip apparently.

    I do think that women politicians have more of a knack for thinking about the good of the whole, even if politics is a corrupt and dirty business. Barbara Jordan was my congresswoman some years back. I was active in the women’s movement and had opportunities to hear her speak to relatively small groups. Electrifying! Just to be around her was wonderful. While I know women today sell us out, and have no illusions about national and state politics, it’s still better to have them in there. At the local level I’ve spent time with a couple of women who were mayors of small cities and who I know were sincere, sacrificing more lucrative careers to make a difference. But their ability to make a difference was seriously hampered.

    @Julia: I do think he was targeted because he is a Democrat. It’s a big “so what?” in my mind. Just like they went after Bill Clinton, but Bush or Cheney, slipped through the radar on it all. But these days not much difference between the two parties. I think that Obama toes the line so he may be safe from being targeted. He can be used as a scapegoat for the collapsing economy, environment, and more, plus as a polarizing figure to give the right more power with the racists and “non-socialists” (as if!). But who cares. The war is against women primarily, half the earth’s population and it is invisible to most people. (not to minimize the horrors of women in war ravaged countries). We never hear of it. It’s just a given to them, whatever the party. Even the most vicious war goes mostly unnoticed as such. Hillary would have been good, because she does notice. But I don’t think they’d allow her to get in office or stay in office.


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